This Song is about that something thats inside of us all the time that we try to fill with these superficial things. Physical pleasure, monetary pleasure and whatever else we want and think we need. It never fills that space in us. But we continue to do it over and over again hoping the next time we’ll get a different result.
"There’s something there inside me and it wont go away"
"From what I’ve lost, I’ve somehow found, things are only what you make them."
Its up to us to find peace within ourselves which is as always easier said than done.
This video was a story of the battle inside of ourselves we face everyday.
The Boy represents the sinister side of me that wants to indulge in all of my juvenile desires.
The Girls, represent the Leads sinister side. I used two girls because women; I feel like, have to hold back twice as much. They’re expected to be responsible sex.
They have double the expectations and pressure in the war of ones self, and what everyone’s perception of you is. Which matters to everyone. Even if they say it doesn’t.
The octopus represents ‘that something inside me’ that wont go away. Keeps pullin’ me in. Making me think I need what it has to offer. So I indulge.
The fish in the tub represents the girl soaking in her selfish desires. Theres a point where you do something so much it gets cloudy and you don’t realize you’re doing it as much. It becomes watered down and not that bad anymore. You get numb to the destructive behavior of yourself. Which is why the water turns white and cloudy and you cannot see the fish anymore.
The blood dripping out of the kids mouth is when we realize how much of a parasite these indulgences really are to our souls. These things that we try to fill our lives with. The dead ends that we want in our lives, that never ever seem to satisfy us. End up sucking our blood and control us.
When I’m pushing the girl under the water this represents the Baptism. The redness that flows out of her represents the thing inside of her. It’s a struggle but we can be cleaned of it. At least I hope so. I’m still working on it. The boy is laughing because he enjoys the struggle of hers. He loves pain. He feeds off seeing other people struggle. The dark side.
At the end of the baptism she returns to me. Freed of the demons that once haunted her.
But in the end we see that the girls are still there after all that. They’re just dormant and in the shadows waiting to strike again.
"Theres something there inside me and it wont go away"